1997-98 Upper Deck #34 – Jarome Iginla — Just imagine: you reach for a hockey stick, and the disembodied head of Jarome Iginla greets you. Then he scores three goals against your team. I’m sure many goalies have had this nightmare.
1989-90 7th Inning Sketch OHL #174 – Casey Jones — Nothing about this team mascot is endearing. His soulless black eyes, blood-red lips and puffy face make him look like a cross between H.R. Pufnstuf and a Stephen King monster from a made-for-TV movie. The fact that Jones is emerging from the shadows just makes him even creepier.
2011-12 Between The Pipes Masked Men #MM09 – Gary Bromley — HIS FACE IS A SKULL! Oh, wait…that’s just his mask. Still, it reminds me of Frank Langella as Skeletor in the live-action Masters of the Universe movie — a movie so bad that I sold off my He-Man figures at a garage sale the next summer.
1994 Collectors’ Sportslook Promo Card – Spawn — Sure, Spawn was technically a good guy. But he was also a trained military assassin and elite solider of Hell with omnipotent powers. According to the back, he takes after Rick Tocchet, too. Be afraid!
1978-79 St. Louis Blues Team Postcards – Barry Gibbs — They say the scariest monsters aren’t vampires, the boogeyman or anything else imagined; the scariest monsters, in fact, already live among us. And only Barry Gibbs knows where the bodies are hidden. ■
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